"How long must my patience be tested before it is rewarded."

The waiting game...

it is a bit tricky, my dears. you dont' not know if you are to sit or stand or to wait or to give it up or...but what are you to do...what are you to say...you are never given any choices that you can just pick like in a multiple choice test...it is, as always like a wrong minus right exam...you answer or you don't. The waiting game is not an exam or a test...it is not a game of monopoly where you can get a get out of jail card...sometimes, in life, there are no second chances...sometimes in life there are simply no right or wrong answers...sometimes in life there are no multiple choices...sometimes in life there are simply no turning the hands of the time back...sometimes A man does what he can until his destiny is revealed to him and you just have to rely on your self to make the best answer...

SMILE (Though Your Heart Is Breaking)

Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...
If you smile
With your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...
Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just...
Smile, though your heart is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...
If you smile
Through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile...
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

9 cigs and counting


how long must i wait
before the night ends
before the sun begins its ascent
illuminating a once darkened sky

tonight would be just one of those nights
the cigs and the blackened night would be your best friend
and no one else
....yes no one else my dear

and you are resigned to that fate
that you will be alone
that you will be unhappy
that you will be forever looking at the night sky
waiting for that elusive falling star
waiting for that sun to shine on your wet and cold face
but it will not come
it will not bless you with its warmth
it will leave you cold and stark naked and ripe for loneliness to embrace you
you are alone

and I am 10 cigs and counting....
adnileb

got this from Rocketboy:

Googlism for: belinda

belinda is back and having a ball
belinda is back page 1
belinda is"
belinda is 0
belinda is the ninth of uranus' known satellites
belinda is the ultimate fantasy
belinda is celebrating her 22nd year with the photography
business along with her most successful year in competition
belinda is a senior at charles henderson high school and has been a "serious"
art student for five years
belinda is a 5x7ft shrub with large clusters of repeating hot pink flowers
that have a
belinda is the author of the professional coach's business system? which is being
used by coaches worldwide
belinda is de negende maan van uranus
belinda is the principal nurse advisor to the government of victoria
belinda is a little rabbit with a very big voice that is always getting her into trouble
belinda is a satellite of the planet uranus
belinda is marrier to the son of actor james mason? in fact
belinda is loud and uncouth
belinda is the story of an older man who falls in love with a sixteen year old actress
belinda is currently on leave to take care of shayna
belinda is back
belinda is the ninth of uranus's known satellites
belinda is albei voltydse sendelinge
belinda is 'n fisioterapeut en het vir 6 jaar by unitas hospitaal
belinda is maybe best known for her role as rebecca fisher/nash in home and away but she has
also done a lot of other things after she left the show in 1999
belinda is more familiar as an accomplished actress in 'home and away' and as a television
presenter for the hilarious 'all time greatest
belinda is a catgirl who likes to lose herself in the 80s; an era of pastel colors
belinda is 30" tall
belinda is the essence of soul
belinda is swiss champion in solo
belinda is delerious for two reasons
belinda is a love story but this one is different belinda is a 16 year old runaway and jeremy is
a 45 year old illustrator and writer of children?s books
belinda is performing in japan
belinda is a graduate from radford university
belinda is shown in the center of the small box and has been enlarged in the inset box
belinda is quick to point out that you must look at the
belinda is married to actor/producer morgan mason
belinda is now added to the list
belinda is aiming to maximise the opportunity to contribute to
belinda is justifiably proud of this
belinda is the heroine alexander pope's the rape of the lock
belinda is planning a series of free seminars to address these issues
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belinda is the one empowered in the end
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belinda is much better looking than gillian anderson
belinda is a limited edition doll
belinda is the focal point of a "strike out ms" program that is a partnership between the
national multiple sclerosis society and teva marion partners
belinda is featured in the tools
belinda is not only the cook from australia's iconic lifestyle programme but its past food editor
belinda is thrown into a state of confusion
belinda is an incredibly dedicated and tenacious person
belinda is the ninth of uranus' satellites
belinda is intrigued and
belinda is a full
belinda is a rich
belinda is always cheerful and willing to help others
belinda is historied and complicated
belinda is
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belinda is a doctor of clinical psychology working for the nhs
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belinda is working perfectly
belinda is now working on her 7th album
belinda is available
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belinda is just as she is on here
belinda is sent so
belinda is the first one to greet you as you walk into the district office
belinda is in year 10 and is 16 years old
belinda is a total professional
belinda is crooning to in the movie "swing shift"
belinda is a registered psychologist with a background in visual perception
and psychophysical measurement
belinda is a self
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belinda is one of a few australian women to be born with a rare form of muscular dystrophy
belinda is also the tourism officer for scone council and says the centre is now linked with
hunter regional tourism and
belinda is even more intelligent/?french than i thought
belinda is a regular
belinda is introduced in all of the lazy grandeur and ease associated with restoration court life
belinda is taller than albert
belinda is involved in a very interesting program involving canine training
belinda is a registered relocation specialist
belinda is responsible for all financial aspects of running the company including financing
belinda is interested in her first nations community and her surroundings
belinda is writing the questions for the quiz this time
belinda is busier than ever at the moment
belinda is an exceptional employee; always on the job
belinda is nicknamed bel

on our way home from Edwin's surprise birthday party in 9 pizza 7 chicken in Ortigas, we passed by a shop in Wilson selling christmas stuff na...Leo karla and I were all saying that the year has definitely gone by so fast...whooosshhh....swwwiissshhh......whooosshhh....swwwiissshhh......whooosshhh...swwwiissshhh......whooosshhh swwwiissshhh...(o tama na)...and i was just thinking a couple of days back that I don't even want christmas to come (no pun intended)...

"sometimes the worst thing for one's heart is loneliness." (ally Mcbeal)


"Its easy to stay happy in manila. Just lie to yourself all the time."

Dear Maria Belinda,
Here is your horoscope
for Sunday, September 19:

After all that drama, here's a day to bring you peace of mind, and the sureness that everything will work out exactly as it should. In other words, you're over it. Congrats.


Dear Maria Belinda,
Here is your horoscope
for Sunday, September 20:

You can forget about yesterday -- for now, anyway. The universe is seeing to it that everything is working out just fine. In the meantime, forget holding onto a grudge. Or anything else

~there you have it. the stars sez so...

today is the start of a 3day restday for me tuesday-thursday...so it'll be like i didn't go to work for this week...maybe I should do this often...i wish! i'm so tamad right now that all the things to do in my list have been all re-scheduled! blame it on the weather!

tonight I have a surprise party to go to...nice to be with my old friends again :)

it's a hot HOT day!

my mind was having an internal war. do i wake up now or later. 5 minutes. sleepy wins round 1. round 2 do i have to wake up now or can I just adjust my schedule instead so I can wake up later. sleepy does it again. round 3. you hafta wake up now or you won't be able to do anything at all. TING! wake-ity uppity side wins. argh!

M1 GB3:

auto doors open. first rack...cookie monster mode! 4 cds! wait i'm looking for something else...can i listen to this...fuck...can i buy all 5? you can't...control control...pak the shet!...dee-cisions! dee-cisions! dee-cisions!...bought 2 cds...take note of the others you didn't buy..i shall return for you my precioussss!



scene: Breton GB3

Breton girl: Ma'm...is it the same po ba?
Me : I'm sorry?
Breton girl: same order ma'm?
Me : what order? (sige nga wise guy..eerr girl pala)
Breton girl: Mango Banana Crepe with extra powdered sugar po and coke

anyenye (ala aiza seguerra!)

and that ends my boring sunday in the office. bonk bonk bonk.

"the rock candies have melted and now only diamonds remain" (Clarity in Heavier Things)

Dear Maria Belinda,

Here is your horoscopefor Tuesday, September 14:You're looking at that to-do list and wondering where to start. Your first move should be to tackle the project you like the least, or to make the phone call you've been putting off for the longest

I've been trying to make a list and a list of lists..gets? I'm trying to make a list of goals I want to achieve before year end. I'm trying to make a list of goals and things to do every month. So far, I haven't been entirely successful. Why? because I can't finish it!!!

pak the shet!




as marc sez this song is appropos for me

Where Do I Begin
(Chemical Brothers)

Sunday morning I'm waking up
Can't even focus on a coffee cup
Don't even know who's bed I'm in
Where do I start
Where do I begin
Where do I startWhere do I begin
Sunday morning I'm waking up
Can't even focus on a coffee cup
Don't even know who's bed I'm in
Where do I startWhere do I begin
Where do I startWhere do I begin