"If you want it you'll find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse." Sunjay Gupta

wrote something awhile back that I'm making some kind of list and I'm happy to tell you that I haven't finished that list until now!

So I'm pressuring myself to make that list on-line...pressure...pressure...pressure!

2004 Goals
1. Lose weight (my forever goal) and do spot toning (dream on!)
2. Take up a sport (is sleeping a sport?)
3. Renovate my room!
4. Fix books..check!
5. Pay off ALL debts...almost there!
6. Travel (pref. via plane to renew frequent flyer miles)
1) Bora
2) HK
7. Go to the beach before year end
8. Get over jerk.....BIG CHECK!
9. Decide what to do after I resign
1) go home (to the states)
2) go back to law school
3) teach

so far ive barely accomplished everything in my list. i'm trying to pursue #1...and I'm done with #s 4 and 8. with 2 months to go i strongly doubt if i'd ever be able to accomplish all of them but then again, there's always next year to waste with list of goals that I never seem to finish...do i hear the clock ticking fast somewhere?


i was that thin before..notice the difference? ;P

i'm cleaning up my Friendster messages and here are the latest funny messages that I got and as usual pang international nanaman ang beauty ko hahahahaha..I'd like to thank Meian (a.k.a Summer and Loneliestperson) for taking THE picture~~taba and all :)

be friend??
Message:
hi wanna friend?im m/30/ukmy yahoo id: ferdaushahmedif want to chat with me welcome
bye
faisal

From: Sameer
Date: June 2, 2004 3:06 PM
Subject: HIYA Message: HI im Sameer hope u dont mind to add me as a friend my yahoo address is yd_devil@yahoo.comTHANKX :)
From:
Sexy
Date:
March 6, 2004 4:43 AM
Subject: Hello Beautiful LADY
Message: Hello,You are nice looking. Why I didnt see a beautiful girl like you when I visit to Philippines?If you send me message I will be very happy. Pls take care. See you....

***I THINK IT'S BECAUSE I HID MYSELF FROM THE LIKES OF YOU, YOU RODENT LOOKING--UGH-PERSON

From:
Trevor
Date:
March 6, 2004 5:31 AM
Subject:
Re: Hi
Message:
Even you dont know me, I hope this site give me a reason to have friends...Thanks and GOD BLESS

Belinda-Maribel wrote:> do i know you?> >

Trevor wrote:> > Just want you to add on my list of friends, can > > we friends? > > > > email: monteros@lycos.com

***I HOPE THIS SITE NEVER GIVES ME REASON TO KILL MYSELF


Message from my first stalker of the year:
From: Ryan
Date: March 28, 2004 4:13 PM
Subject: Re: hi
Message: sorry if na ofend kita , my name is ryan guarino, 25 yrs old, taga pasig, single, work me eastwood call center as a technical support, graduate me ece -engineering sa ue? tatlo kami magkakapatid panganay me hope nakilala mo me kahit papano, ok lang ba kahit cell# mo lang thanks nga pala for calling me sweetee

Same stalker:
From: Ryan
Date: March 29, 2004 11:58 PM
Subject:
Re: hi
Message:
baka pwede mo me bigyan consideration na malaman ko cell# mo???take care

From my second stalker:
From: Xhristian
Date: May 15, 2004 5:29 AM
Subject:
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Message:
ah thats the second NO or the second no reply everytime i ask that question.mind me asking why?why?



From:
Concho
Date:
June 1, 2004 9:11 PM
Subject:
hey
Message:
your one hell of a lady!heaven must be missing an angel.WIsh we could talk formally.got a #?

10 Things:

10 things I enjoy watching
1. CSI (on tv)
2. News! News! (on tv)
3. kids playing
4. Sunsets
5. People
6. Just shoot me (on tv)
7. Will and Grace (on tv)
8. Futbol (Viva Real)
9. Baseball
10. people I love *heart*

10 favorite places
1. Libraries
2. Breton in GB3
3. SF
4. Velasquez Park
5. Greenhills when its not crowded
6. Old Powerbooks in Arnaiz
7. AA Retreat House
8. my old bed in my mom's bedroom
9. my room
10. in the arms of the man i love (wishing out loud )

All curses must end...even if it's Boston...The Red Sox won the World Series after 86 years defeating the Cardinals in a sweep 11-9 , 6-2 , 4-1, 3-0.

I couldn't sleep last night. I got home at 2am from my usual wednesday night out and was not able to sleep till 5am and woke up at 10am...sarap...think i need my sleeping pills again...

took a bunch of quizzes while I was waiting for my mind to sleep and here's one funny test that I took

The Zodiac Match
(TestDate The Right Sign For Your Personality) <----is there even such a thing????? Belinda, the best Zodiac Match for your personality is Cancer

Cancer, the Crab (June 22 to July 22):

This emotional and imaginative partner is just your type. Initially, a Cancerian may catch your
eye because of their romantic ways and dedication to you. But as you get to know them, you're even more likely to be drawn to your Cancer's practicality and ability to nurture you. People born under this sign tend to be true-blue, loyal partners who are willing to devote their hearts and souls to their close relationships. Because of the deep investment they'll put into others, Cancerians can be easily hurt and may seem overly sensitive at times. However, more often, Cancers are simply warm and compassionate mates. In the bedroom, you may find the Crab a bit hard to coax out of its shell — at least at first. Cancers can be somewhat timid lovers in comparison to other signs. Typically, a Cancer's nature is to value family above all else. As a result, if you can make a Cancer happy and earn that familial title, you can be sure that this partner will always be there for you.

I don't think I know a lot of people who were born under this sign...checking my calendar...there's no one that I know who's birthday fall between June 22-July 22 not even any female friends ***scratches head*** ..let's try checking any cute celebrities who's birthday falls under that sign....as if....hehehehehe....brad pitt john travolta? ben affleck...kevin spacey? gabriel bryne? christian bautista...

and so 2 weds ago, it was farting contest inside Tom's built to last batmobile and last wed, it was comparing Ferrino's bibingka in 2 different branches. last night it was going all the way to Mang Jimmy's near UP and eating 3 huge dishes of tapa, porkchop and siZig and 2 gargantuan plates of rice that disapperead in 10 minutes and next week promises to be another interesting wednesday since we'd going to this place they've been going to in Binondo~another girlie bar...hay naku...

eversince i got wednesday thursday off, i've been spending my wednesday nights with 2 of my oldest friends Den and Tom. Oman (from a previous misconstrued post) and those 2 are just part of a 9 boys and 1 girl (?)-that's me barkada...if they hear refer to us as a barkada I'll be the laughing stock of these guys till the next century. Not a lot of people know that I am more comfortable being with guys than with girls. why? because they're easier to deal with. i hated having girlfriends who would flock to the bathroom in throves or spend an hour or two deciding on where to eat. i abhor that kind of "practice". Coming from an all-girls school just makes one wonder why I have this inclination. one word: abner.

Not until I started working in Etel did I meet my would be life long friends...story reserved on a future entry...going back, I have always been comfortable having male friends. maybe it's because I grew up (no pun intended) in an all male household. Until 2nd year HS, I was the only girl in a family of 5. my mom always hated it when I'd play ball with my male cousins who used to live with us and my 2 brothers. That meant learning to play ball or else be stuck playing Barbie and lutu-lutuan all alone. So at a very young age, I've been playing ball---basketball and baseball with my male ensemble. My kuya Angelo-who's now a captain in the US army stationed in Germany, my kuya Mike, my younger bro Ton-Ton and, yes, even Stupid Dog. Stupid Dog is my older brother who I know abhor for being the total embodiment of being kupal and other cousins and their friends who'd always make tambay in our house since we used to have our very own half court at home. Some of those friends were Tom, Dennis, Kel (my some kinda ex), Eric, Oman.....So my all male barkada who used to be friends of my younger bro ton are now my oldest set of friends.

The same barkada who had the guts to make me their messenger and deliverer of notes loveletters and flowers to their girl of the moment-even if it meant, when I was still in GY, not sleeping till 2pm just to make sure that I deliver all of their packages. The same barkada who brought me to live shows and KTVs---these are not your usual red box and IO ktv okei! The same barkada who I have slept with--tabi tabi in one queen size bed. 4 width challenge males (Barnie, Fred, Oman and Rusty), 1 stick size (Tom) and me all sleeping in one dusty bed. Imagine that plus the smell of fart till the wee hours of the morning. They were having a who's fart smelled the "sweetest" contest and I was the judge-B L E C H ! ! ! and li'l o'le me was sleeping at the end of the bed so I was always being bumped off the bed. after that incident, I picked a new bed mate who always made sure na I had my own space-eric. but he snored the loudest! oh well, one can't have her cake and eat it too.


Blues are some of the most loving, nurturing and
supportive personalities. They live from their
heart and emotions. Their purpose for being on
the planet is to give love, to teach love and
to learn that they are loved. Their priorities
are love, relationships, and spirituality.


What Is Your True Aura Colour?
brought to you by Quizilla


I CANNOT SLEEP AND IT'S 5AM!!!

maybe this is my love story...

maybe unlike other people who have been blessed to find their life's soulmate

i am destined to never find that one person who will love me enduringly and faithfully until our dying breath...

maybe fate has other plans for me

maybe no serendipitous moment will ever pass my way or will ever knock at my door...

maybe...

but i would like it to be otherwise...

i would give my life's breath to find my north star

i would give my life's breath to find...to find that one person who will stop the world in an instant just by the mere sight of him

...a love that is always constant and lit even in the darkest of nights

a love that will live for me and only me

a love that will melt all the pain and will dry all the tears

a love that will be like summer snow...warm and cool

a love that is like the wind when you wake up on christmas day...exciting and full of joy

a love that is like the first ray of the sun...pure and warm

a love that will be...just how i feel now...chaotic but purposeful...with so many ideas but just has one intent and that is to love...to love one person until our days have waned and our time has passed...

"Is there anyone out there coz it's getting harder and harder to breathe."

Is it easy for you to show mercy to those who hurt you? It's easier perhaps to make things difficult for them and make them feel the misery we suffer, right?

But the way Jesus deals with difficult people is that of mercy and compassion. He didn't brand or condemn as eveil those who put Him on the spot and accused Him. When your heart finds it hard to show mercy, try again. Look at others with Jesus' eyes. The mercy and compassion we give may be the very ones we need for ourselves!